I get to go a traveling today. Oh how excited am I? Not really…I mean yes getting out of the house is a treat when you can’t drive and you spend your time conversing with a cat and a rabbit all day. My collection of Build-A-Bears who can only respond with “I Love You! I Love You!” while that is important, there does seem to be something missing when you really could use something a little more helpful every now and then. Riding the 40 miles into the city is hard. Right after my first surgery I would get so incredibly car sick, and I would stay car sick the rest of the day that was really unpleasant. We learned in January of this year that I have neurological complications from the anesthesia. Yup you knock me out with general anesthesia and my body decides to remind you it hates you for the next year. We finally got the migraines and car sickness under control in June with daily medication and in about a week I’m having surgery again under general anesthesia. Yup live is like a roller coaster, you get off one ride and you get in line for the next.
So I’m going into the city because I have an appointment and I have to talk to a new person about all the medical stuff that is going on and honestly I don’t want to! I know I need to, and in a way I do want to, but I get really anxious when I have to talk to new people. My primary care doctor noticed that even when I go to see him I have started to get some white coat syndrome. So much seems to go wrong with me health wise this year that I get really anxious and my blood pressure rises, which is never a good thing.
Today I am going to make it a good day. I am going to take a deep breath, say the serenity prayer a million times, and remember that it’s my wife’s birthday, it’s hump day and this new person can only be but so scary….RIGHT?