Bonito..todo me parece bonito

So when I lived in Spain many years ago I really got into Jarabe De Palo’s music and one of my favorite song’s is “Bonito”. The first line which I made the title of this blog translates to beautiful, everything I see is beautiful. When you keep a positive attitude things seem better even when things are bad. When I was in the hospital with my saddle pulmonary embolism I was really positive and I only cried a few times because I knew I was going to survive. The first five days I was in intensive care the doctors kept telling my family I might not make it. They were not convinced that I would survive. For five days my Mother prayed for me.

Those first five days I don’t remember a whole lot, I slept a lot, I remember I kept telling the doctors to keep me alive! I was told over and over again how close I was to death that if I were to get out of bed I could die, etc. Of course I was so weak that getting out of bed was like the last thing on my to do list! The first time I remember getting out of bed it was like freedom and then I did it and I thought am I sure I want this freedom? I still was hooked up to oxygen, IV and all these monitors so it was quite the feat to get me out of bed! Walking wasn’t that much fun having a huge blood clot sitting on both sides of my lungs!

I met with the hematologist this week to discuss my upcoming surgery and if I should have a IVC filter placed before surgery. He did not make this recommendation lightly. We looked at the pros and cons of filter placement and we both agreed that it would be for the best for me because of my history.

So while I was there I got to see the scans from my blood clot and I have to say I am glad that I know this clot is gone now. I am glad I did not see the scans while it was still sitting in my chest because if I had it probably would have given me a heart attack. The scans were something else! HOWEVER I’m smarter now on what a blood clot feels like, what symptoms I have, and we are doing blood thinners after surgery so all is well. I know that we learned a lot from my experience last year and it was a great teacher going into this next surgery.

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