So Wifey goes did you hear that? Nope sorry was in my own little world over here bombing my newsgroup with emojis and playing games. What? The cat…Creme sounds like she is coughing up a hairball in her sleep… Do you think she was having a nightmare? I mean do cats have nightmares like people do? Can you imagine that? I wonder if they have nightmares like ooh hairball the size of the sofa is chasing me around the house!! I’m out of wet food! I have to poop in the toilet! I mean seriously I’m sure there are lots of possible nightmare scenarios for a cat. No wet food, I can see the bottom of my bowl again, she bought 6 Christmas sweaters on clearance! I mean seriously!
Speaking of nightmares this morning I had this really weird dream that woke me up at 5:45am and all I can remember at the end is someone screamed LESBIANS!!! Now whether that was in the good way or the bad way I really can’t remember! I just remember waking up and looking at the green of the numbers on the clock and trying to decide do I get up now or do I try to sleep a bit longer and after laying in the bed for about 10 minutes I decided to just get up.
Some days you just don’t fight sleep you just get up and hope you can nap later in the day. I mean I’ve learned from the insomnia, sleep apnea and who knows what other undiagnosed sleep issues I have sometimes you just can’t win. Does still make me wonder about what cats dream about big balls of yarn, rolls of toilet paper, I mean there must be something right?
Because between my wife and I get SOOO MUCH SLEEP….*insert heavy sarcasm* At 1am this morning we hear yodeling. Yes you read that correctly yodeling now wait for it…wait for it from a pickle. Yes a pickle.
This is the offending pickle. So at 1am my wife wakes me up and goes where is the pickle??!!! Thinking it had fallen off the dresser. So I lift my head up and look over on the dresser and it’s still sitting right where it was when we went to bed. So I say to her through the CPAP mask, it’s still safely on the dresser, she shakes her head, turns the light back off and we go back to sleep.
Now how many people can say they woke up because of a pickle? And of those people how many people can say their pickle was yodeling? I mean really? The pickle was part of her Christmas gift exchange at work and I’m thinking she is regretting it. I still think its hilarious and I’ll put up with a little yodeling, but I’m thinking that the pickle is going to be finding a new home outside the bedroom tonight. No offense yodeling pickle but 1am is not when I want to hear the yodels of your people!
So ever since I was a child I tend to sleep on the edge of the bed. I remember one summer at 4-H camp my camp counselor was concerned because I was sleeping on my side on the edge of the bunk-bed. They stood looking at me trying to decide was it safer to leave me sleep, or should they try to wake me up, if they woke me would I fall on the floor. So they decided after watching me sleep (creepy right?) they would continue on their bed checks.
So this morning I woke up at 7am and realized and not sure how I was doing this but my right arm was suspended in midair, however I was sleeping it was totally asleep. Now that I am concous I need to slowly and carefully move it back on the bed, OOOWWWWW that REALLY hurts, and I hate the pins and needles feeling of my arm waking up after its been asleep. The best part is my wife is asleep and my cpap mask is on and I can’t take it off because my arm is currently asleep from shoulder all the way down to fingertips. Hmmm what can I do but take some deep breaths count to 10 and tell myself that it will be all over once my nerves decide they are awake.
Nerve pain is nothing new to me. I feel it ALL the time it seems, my nerves are so messed up from the fibromyalgia that I often have nerve pain in different areas of my body. I lay in agony because I can’t make any loud noises I don’t want to wake up Jenna that would not be fair to her, she has about 30 minutes before she has to be up. Nothing worse than be awoken early by something stupid. Yup this falls in the stupid category I mean really! My arm is asleep. Honey I’m sorry I let out blood curdling screams this morning my arm decided it wanted to play Houdini early this morning and then my nerves hurt so I screamed and made you think I was dying..it was nothing really. Yeah on a Monday, I might be looking for a divorce lawyer. I mean she loves me, but there are just certain actions you DON’T do on a Monday. Now if it was a Thursday or a Friday I might get away with it, but definitely not on a Monday.
So I sleep with a CPAP (continuous positive airway pressure) machine which means the machine pushes air to maintain my airway so I don’t stop breathing during the night. Well around 6:30am we lost power which means the machine cut off. Now this does not mean that all the sudden I suffocate because I can still breathe because air still flows through the tubing it’s just not pressurized and there is a clicking sound when the pressure stops. Well as you can imagine this woke me up. So I go to take the mask off and just as I take the mask off the power comes back on! Hmmm….that was odd but we live on a dirt road so stranger things have happened and I now have two options, put the mask back on and turn the machine back on and go back to sleep or just get up not knowing what time it is, but judging from the daylight outside somewhere between 6am and 7am. So I chose to wake up. Sometimes it’s just easier to get up than to try and fall back asleep.
So I get on trusty Facebook because that’s where we all get our up to the minute news and find out there was a car accident in my neighborhood and that could be causing flickering lights and small power outages..YUP! BINGO! We have a winner! Okay, now that we got that figured out we have had a shower, made some coffee, taken meds, gotten dressed and had breakfast…can I go back to bed??
It takes a lot of energy to do the simplest of tasks these days and by the time I have my morning routine done I’m ready for bed again. Today is a very special day. We are celebrating my Daddy’s 60th birthday. I am Daddy’s little girl for sure! Of course I’m sure my sister would say the same thing! My Dad taught me to program computers and he and I share a lot of the same interests. He would read me sci-fi books when I was little like Douglas Adams, “Lord of the Rings,” and to round things off he would also read me things like “Shakespeare.” My parents wanted to make sure I had a well rounded education so while I do love technology and I also was in the band, drama and sang in the church choir growing up. I also took up Spanish and in college have one of my two undergraduate degrees in Modern Languages/Spanish. So I think they did well for making sure I dabbled in a bit of everything!